Do We Learn Anything?

Article appeared in Killie Hippo 84 (out 15th November 2008)

Do We Learn Anything?
(a story of apathy, training methods and fear from the Glasgow Science Centre)
(well not exactly from, as I have never been)
(but then who has?)

I really want to be positive about this season because it has really gone well I feel, good results here and there, a together looking squad, far removed from last year, I have written a fair few articles in here in past few years and it is nice to write positive things, but I sit here on the Friday after our CIS, Co-op or whatever its branded, league cup exit and I find myself unsure, I even left writing this an extra day as I could have easily written it yesterday but didn’t want to spout all sorts of venomous vitriol about the Quarter final game because its not really synonymous to our season. But as it happens I feel the same today so may as well give it both barrels because I fear these problems could rear their head at any point here on in. The game as you know ended three one.

After the game while walking back to my car I looked forward to the first person to utter the famous phrase "we were shite but there not much better" because sadly that statement is a load of meaningless bollocks, especially said after last nights display, I decided to go into the pub to wait for the traffic to calm down (I use this as an excuse, I could easily used; wanted to see end of Arsenal game or fancied a can of juice, however none of that’s true I was basically spoiling for an argument) someone did utter that stupidest of stupid sayings but I didn’t have the heart to take him to task, his girlfriend had their first child earlier in the week.

So effectively I am taking it that whoever reads this has said that thing to me, so this is how I would reply. Celtic were streets ahead of us, playing neat little triangles and breaking at pace when the opportunity arises. Personally it makes me wonder what we actually do when we go up to Glasgow to train, play hide and seek perhaps. Games like these show up how much fitter the old firm seem in comparison to us, this is something which can be easily reversed, we may not be able to bring in the top players or pay the greatest wages but surely we can get our team fitter than anyone else, we are a full time club with full time players, super fitness should be an easy attribute to acquire and keep for professional SPL players, we can harry them for 90minutes, close them down. It is also worth noting that pass and move exercises are performed by every team of all ages in every training session in every town in every country in every universe, and exercises where shutting down these passing movements are performed also, god, I did it when I trained, its the fundamentals!

Its these fundamentals that we seem to lack. Other gripes about training, why cant we defend corners. Scott MacDonald scored a header, that’s Scott MacDonald who a week earlier was described as one of Celtic seven dwarves, a wee mistake on our part then? It would seem no, he missed a further two or three headers from corners also, how does this happen? Free kicks that are played into our box, again in every training session in Britain you defend your 18 yard line, we don’t. somewhere closer to ten yards out is ok by us, where did we learn this? So set plays haven’t been mastered to any degree it would seem and even if they were the fact that it happens repeatedly in games means that we learn nothing from week to week, hell, from corner to corner. When attacking? Any set plays we had ourselves were wee floated in poofy balls that are meat and drink to the Caldwell’s of this world, no variation or anyone who looked like they had a clue. Turning defence into attack, non existent, this would come under the fitness aspect I suppose though, which I have covered and to reiterate WE DONT MATCH UP! Finally, err, do we ever shoot?

Tactics chosen seem odd, we change our system to play only these two teams, one man up front (our winger) one in behind. Two breakers in the middle, two wingers (our two most creative centre mids). it didn’t work, we didn’t change it. When watching the Man U v Celtic game a week earlier I felt that Strachan bottled the tactics battle. He played a Killie move against them. But why didn’t he pick out their weaknesses and punish them? make the game work for him, he had an opportunity with his wingers to crucify Gary Neville in the right back role, show Fergie that he is done as a Man U player, he never and Neville was allowed to push on and assist in the demolition instead of being hemmed back and ran ragged. Now that’s not to say that that would exactly happen but its would have been at the very least a showing of attacking tactics! Roll onto Wednesday and we can look at the Celtic line up, weak link possibly? Wilson at left back? He is predominantly right footed and cant tackle with his left foot, a perfect opportunity to put our right winger (Danny) up against him put him under pressure by going outside again and again. Make Strachan change his team. Again these things are great in hindsight and I am merely a punter, who am I exactly to come up with elaborate tactics to break down oppositions? Indeed, but then these managers are paid big money to come up with ways of getting results surely and us punters are only there to watch, yes watch from our elevated position in the stands (positions where team shape and players performances are far easier spotted, far easier than say pitch level where it is impossible to see exactly what positions the players on the other side of the field have taken up) but I digress…..

Back to my point, there seems to be a blatant lack of coaching in our players. It would be good if the fans all club together, a quid each and hire out the powerleague and see what actually goes on in a Killie training session, if were paying for it then surely they cant refuse? or like other aspects of our esteemed club (they're disregard of the website poty for instance, we are constantly asked to get out and support our team, our players but when they are asked to support us it’s a different story it seems to me) they are far more happy when they hide from they people who pay to see them and love them unconditionally. What a truly frightening combination that is after all.

Basically that’s how I feel, I could go into detail about my disappointment in certain players performances, but what would be the point. I could talk about the poor refereeing seen again this season, tell me how the common man can get behind these guys when they are paid £800 a week minimum for a second income! yellow cards for first tackles for our players, Caldwell makes ten fouls adjudged to be the ref merit able in stopping the play but he goes uncarded, but again what would be the point. I could talk about self belief, it too seems to be lacking, from comments from our players and our manager in particular it doesn’t seem to me that he feels we can beat them so basically were onto plums before a ball is kicked. Every other team in the league give the big two a good go every once in a while, I struggle to think when we did last, it gets to the point where I dread these games, including even the point this season where we came into our games against them unbeaten!

But no, the thing that stood out predominantly for me on Wednesday was the poor levels of fitness and obvious lack of the basic fundamentals that we are all taught from an early age. I haven’t played football to any sort of level in my life but I do know that at its core football hasn’t changed, the players may have, but the basics remain the same.